Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Graffiti of the Heart: Verbal Abuse

The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.
Proverbs 15:4

Is there anyone who hasn't felt the sting of hateful, mean-spirited words spewing out all over their formally placid mind? The shock of those bitter words flows through you like no other feeling you can recall. We've all been there and know that feeling--the paralyzing quality of their meaning. And all of us ask the same questions: How could they say that? What are they thinking? What have I done?!!! Sometimes we can answer those questions, and sometimes we can't. We usually respond with anger and outrage. But should we?

In Chapter 3 of F. LaGard Smith's Meeting God in Quiet Places, he addresses this kind of desecration written on our mental walls. How do we cope with this kind of attack? Can we find a similar situation in the Bible? Yes, David's anguish at being attacked with slander by friends can be compared to our own. And who has suffered the most pain from slander and betrayal by friends? Jesus, our Saviour. 

I have often referred to the Psalms because within them lies all of the elements we experience in our own lives. In this parable, the same connection is made when David writes poems about his enemies speaking evil of him. Not great armies coming against him, but hateful words. David even prays for protection from the words of his enemies, many who hate him simply because he is "a man after God's own heart." Like our own enemies, David's were just waiting for him to fail, so they could heap scorn on him. Our enemies are waiting for us to fail, waiting for us to show our struggling faith, so they can express words of derision and hurt. 

But when you think about it, it isn't surprising that our enemies throw hateful words at us. Having no regard for anything spiritual, and by pointing out our faults, they justify their own sinful ways. That is the way it works in the world. 

However, it is when the one who has abused you is a loved one that you are most deeply hurt. This also happened to David, and we can only guess who he was talking about in one of his psalms: Was it King Saul, who loved him like a son, then tried to kill him? Or maybe his beloved son Absalom, who brought a rebellion against him? Two people close to David--people he loved--betrayed him!

Can you imagine how David felt, because you have also had this experience? Has a close friend or relative betrayed you? Your first reaction is to give back in kind. Like David, you feel totally validated in asking God to help you get back at them. David said of his enemy: "May his days be few. May another take his place of leadership. May his children be fatherless and his wife a widow. May his children be wandering beggars. May a creditor seize all he has. May strangers plunder the fruits of his labor. May no one extend kindness to him or take pity on his fatherless children." 
OUCH! Can this be the same David who wrote the 23rd Psalm?

You'll get the answer to that question tomorrow. I hope your week is going smoothly!

Blessings...Mimi 

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